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14Jul/110

Captain Sexyvoice Asks Why Nintendo Won’t Let Us Give Them More Money

Any perception of railing mercilessly on Nintendo recently is strictly coincidental (at least, until I find out what today's 3DS downloads are). This is actually a valid argument for giving Nintendo more of our money... if it would let us. Meet Andrew Eisen, a man with a quality headset for recording videos, a taste for Japanese video games, and all the affectations of a white Billy Dee Williams. And if you can ignore his Colt 45-pitching verbal swagger for a minute, you can hear his very good point.

Nintendo is passing up on publishing a lot of great Japanese games in America. The Last Story. Xenoblade. Another Code R. Disaster: Day of Crisis. Pandora's Tower. Fatal Frame 4. No, these aren't system sellers, but they're games of such appeal to hardcore gamers, especially hardcore JRPG/J-Adventure/J-Survival Horror gamers, that they would almost certainly make Nintendo a significant amount of money. Eisen ran the numbers and looked at the trends and found that tons of games released in both America and Japan, no matter how obscure or Japanese, get more sales in America than in Japan. Consider the success of games like Muramasa, Tatsunoko Vs. Capcom, Trauma Center, and Arc Rise Fantasia, and of extremely Japanese publishers like Atlus, XSEED, and Aksys. Japanese games aren't just for the really, really, really dorky otaku nerds who want anything from Japan anymore. We want quality games, even if they're weird, and especially if they're spiritual successors to Xenogears or created by the man behind the good Final Fantasy games, or was directed by Suda 51 to be utterly terrifying.

These games are already made. Many of them are already ported to English, so they literally just need to be switched to NTSC and re-pressed. That's it. It's not like a major effort Nintendo would have to go through. Even if it was a series of short, limited runs, the company could easily make a big chunk of money in America by putting out these games. And, as Eisen noted, we can't even play the European releases, already translated, because the Wii (and the 3DS, sadly) are both region locked. Even if we bought the games legitimately, as importers do, we can't play them.

This isn't even an understandable decision by Nintendo to ignore hardcore gamers because they'll still give the company money for the big system seller games. Hardcore gamers will give Nintendo even more money for these titles, but Nintendo doesn't seem to want that. 99% of the work is done getting the games to the U.S. They've been developed. Several have been translated. It's just a matter of making them compatible with American Wiis and selling them here. Once again, Nintendo is just refusing to move an inch to please the hardcore crowd. And this time, they're actually giving up money in the process.

1Jul/112

Nintendo Isn’t Just Ignoring Gamers; It’s Humiliating Us With Nostalgia

I'm a lifelong Nintendo fanboy. I grew up with the NES and SNES. During the first 3D console war in the mid-90's, I sided with the Nintendo 64 despite missing out on many, many great games until years later. I was optimistic for the Wii, and the DS completely won me over. That said, I've realized something about Nintendo that I think always floated around in the back of my mind, but that I didn't really accept until the WiiU was announced.

Nintendo doesn't care about wooing hardcore gamers. Yes, jaded gamers think this is self-evident, but it's actually worse than it seems. Nintendo doesn't care about wooing hardcore gamers because we'll come back to them anyway. That is the truly terrible thing about Nintendo's current strategy. It doesn't matter how disappointing their hardware is, how inept their handling of online services is, or how much they bother to build a platform that third party developers actually feel like using to make a decent game and not just a half-assed semi-port.

Let me be crude but concise. Nintendo is our cheating ex-girlfriend who, every six months or so, calls us up at 2:00 a.m. looking for action. And, because we are idiots and she does that one thing we like, we come over. Maybe it's a one-night stand, maybe it's a short rekindling of the relationship, but it always ends with her completely ignoring us and sleeping with our little brother.

23May/112

Nintendo’s New Console Gets Detailed (Based Purely On Past Consoles)

Nintendo will hopefully officially announce "Project Cafe" at E3 next month, but gamers are waiting for details on the next Wii, and I'm not sure they'll be able to hold out. Fortunately, through the power of extrapolation, I've been able to figure out some important details about the new system. By looking at Nintendo's previous systems, we can determine what Project Cafe will be like, on both a hardware and service level.

These might be completely wrong. According to some far-fetched rumors, Nintendo will pull a complete 180 on its precious consoles and the trends they set. Until we have actual, hard confirmation about this, however, the only thing we have to go on is what Nintendo has done in the past. Here are our expected bullet points for the new Nintendo system. Read on for our explanations of... well, why.

  • Little to No Onboard Storage
  • Backwards Compatible (At First)
  • Online Services (Expected to Launch in 2012)
  • Downloadable Games (That You Will Never See or Care About)
  • The Controller Will Be Weird
  • Processing Power Will Be Decent, Not a Priority
  • THERE WILL BE A BIG SURPRISE
19May/110

Nintendo Starts Shipping $150 Wii Bundles, $20 Games

We reported that Nintendo would be dropping the Wii price to $150 over a week ago, but it's finally happening. Amazon, Gamestop, Best Buy, and other vendors are now selling the $150 Mario Kart Wii bundle. This isn't a promotional sale, but a permanent, lower price for the system. $150 gets you the Wii, a Remote Plus (yet no Wii Sports Resort; you'll have to buy that separately), a nunchuck, a steering wheel accessory, and a copy of Mario Kart Wii. At this point, you really don't have an excuse to pick up the system. Hell, just Mario Kart and the Gamecube backwards compatibility make it worth the price.

If you want some more games to go with your new Wii, the new Nintendo Selects line of games are also shipping. They're Nintendo's Platinum/Greatest Hits titles, and they're... well, one's pretty good. You can grab The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princes
for $20. The other games are Wii Sports (again, not Wii Sports Resort), Mario Super Sluggers (really?), and Animal Crossing: City Folk (eh... addictive enough to be worth it, if you haven't played an Animal Crossing game before). Really, with the exception of Zelda, you should just buy used or play Wii games through Gamefly.

4May/111

Wii Bundles Drop to $150, $20 Classic Titles Announced

Say what you will about the Nintendo Wii, but there have been enough great games released on it to justify paying... let's say $150. That's a nice, arbitrary amount, right? And while $40-50 might be a bit steep to play those great games, doesn't $20 sound fair? Well, good news. Nintendo is going budget. Kind of.

The company just announced that the Wii will be dropping in price to $149.99, and that this new bundle will include Mario Kart Wii and a steering wheel accessory instead of Wii Sports/Wii Sports Resort. Nintendo also announced the Nintendo Selects series, Nintendo's version of a Greatest Hits collection. Each Nintendo Selects game will cost just $19.99, meaning you can get some pretty good gaming going on for just $170.

Unfortunately, the only announced Nintendo Selects games currently are Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess, Animal Crossing: City Folk, Mario Super Sluggers, and Wii Sports. Besides Zelda, it's not exactly a stellar lineup. Yeah, if you want a real Mario game or Donkey Kong Country returns, that's still going to cost you over $40. On the bright side, Metroid: Other M can be picked up for just $14.99. Of course, that's because Metroid: Other M was a piece of shit that seriously damaged the beloved franchise, perhaps irreparably.

This price drop is clearly to make room for the next Nintendo system, which will be announced at E3 2011. It's a great deal, though. The Wii is already 100% backwards compatible with the Gamecube, so for $150 (plus maybe $40 for a Gamecube controller and memory card), you have two full generations full of great games available to you, for less than $200. That's really not bad at all.

27Apr/110

Nintendo’s New Console Rumor Round-Up

Well, scratch that off your E3 bingo cards; Nintendo is definitely absolutely positively showing off they next gen console at E3 and it will be playable. And if the rumors are true, it's also aiming to be the single most un-Nintendo product they have released yet. Let's take a look are some of the crazy predictions about the next Nintendo.

26Apr/112

Nintendo to reveal next console at E3

Rumors swirl around the mysterious successor to the Wii - that it's code named "Project Cafe," that its controllers will have mini touchscreens built into them - so expect the record to be set straight when Nintendo pulls the curtain off the Wii's successor at E3 this June. Consider this the official announcement of the official announcement of the system, and expect to see the smiling face Reggie "My Body is Ready" Fils-Aime towering intimidatingly over that of Shigeru "Shiggy" Miyamoto as they boast about features.

After the Wii's initial mega-success began to taper off, it sure seemed like Nintendo relegated it to the back burner in favor of handheld offerings, where their domination is near absolute. What major Wii titles are on the radar now that aren't yet another edition to a Nintendo in-house franchise? Now with the clock ticking on the Wii's lifespan, I can't help but feel Nintendo squandered their console's incredible market penetration by failing to follow through with games as innovative as their technology. Sony and Microsoft scrambled to catch up to the motion-control craze, so now Nintendo seems to be resting their hopes on pushing the ball forward yet again.

2Jan/113

Super Mario All-Stars Wii $60-100 on eBay

I'll give Nintendo credit for this: when they say "limited edition," they mean "limited edition." Despite releasing a shoddy, lazy port that not only added nothing to a 17-year-old release but added a lag that made it nearly unplayable, Nintendo has indeed kept true to its word and only produced a single run of Super Mario All-Stars Limited Edition for the Wii.

eBay is flooded with Super Mario All-Stars for the Wii, but the games are being bought, and for over twice their retail price. On the first search page of completed listings, only 4 of the 50 copies that came up went unsold. The others sold for between $60 and $100, averaging in the $70's. For reference, the game sold for just $30 in stores a few months ago. The game went out fast, and is completely gone from the shelves of Best Buy and Gamestop. You can still order it from Amazon... from Marketplace vendors selling it starting at $68.

As a side note, just for a splash of contrast, the Halo: Reach Legendary Edition is still readily available. Amazon has it for $99, and Gamestop has it for $79. It was $149 when it first came out in September, 2 months before Super Mario All-Stars. Say what you will about fanboys, they certainly make game collecting interesting.

26Dec/101

Epic Mickey: The Good, The Bad, and The Disney

Warren Spector, the mind behind some of the best games in PC history, got his hands on Mickey Mouse, the most famous fictional character in the world. It's a strange combination, but between Spector's impressive history of games (Thief, Deus Ex, Ultima Underworld, Wing Commander) and Mickey's history of actually having games based on him that weren't total shit (Castle of Illusion, Magical Quest, Kingdom Hearts), gamers have been hesitantly hopeful about what the pact between Disney and Spector that is Junction Point Studios could come up with.

The end result is a good game with moments of greatness. Or a great game held back by major flaws. Or a mediocre game that shows solid gameplay but ends up squandering its potential. Disney's Epic Mickey is a hard game to judge, but we're going to try. Read on.

16Dec/100

From the Past: 25th Anniversary Wii Limited Edition Super Mario All-Stars

Yep, it's still the 25th anniversary of Super Mario Bros. The limited edition Wii version of Super Mario All-Stars came out last week, and it offers a ton of nostalgic value for $30. The box set includes the SNES classic Super Mario All-Stars ported on disc to the Wii, a soundtrack of Mario music, and a booklet about gaming's favorite plumber. As a Nintendo fanboy's walk down memory lane, this is a great deal. As a gaming experience, not so much. It's more than the issue of copying a 17-year-old game to the Wii, but to get the full story you'll have to read after the jump.