I wish I was kidding, but Super Mario 3D Land has actively taken pity on me. It’ll take pity on you, too, and shame you in the most unspeakable way. It’s more of Nintendo’s casual-friendly approach of “making the game stupidly easy in the stupidest way,” taken to a horrible extreme.

If you die enough times on a level (between 6 and 8), the game creates a Pity Block. It’s a flashing block that makes a glowing raccoon leaf. If you pick up that leaf, you become Raccoon Mario… with unlimited invincibility. Yes, this game doesn’t simply hold your hand or show you how to win. It turns on god mode for you.

Does it disable star coins, or mark levels you beat it with a scarlet S, for You Suck As A Gamer? No. You don’t get penalized at all. There is no record of your failure. There is no punishment. There is no way to even keep track which levels you had to lose through. There is just your crippling shame and the gnawing uncertainty of the entire game and your ability as a gamer.

I’m fine with giving casual players a way to see all the game (or most of the game) without much effort. It’s fine to give them an autopilot and let them beat the game. But to get everything in the game, including those star coins that basically show you how good you are at playing, is just wrong. Take out the coins. Put a mark on the level. Put something there to show when you take the easy way out. The shame is so much worse when only you’re aware of it.