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Video game love affairs and booty calls

When we invest money and attention in a video game system, we bond with it. Anyone who grew up with a video game system probably feels as much if not more attachment to that system than to their first girlfriend. We embraced our consoles of choice like our own identity; we weren't just kids, we were NES kids, or SNES kids, or Genesis kids, or Playstation kids. Fights would break out over which console was better. We took sides and we loved it.

We still have love affairs with our game systems. Sure, the arguments have cooled down a bit as gamers have gotten older and the video game market has gotten much bigger and more cross-platform. If you only have an Xbox 360 or a Playstation 3, you might still feel a bit defensive about which system is superior, but when nearly every major title is available on both platforms, it simply boils down to exclusives and online service. Still, we feel close to our consoles, and they remain a staple of our homes.

Some systems just can't keep the passion alive. Maybe you had a strong relationship with them in the past, when the very idea was fresh and new, but in retrospect you don't really see why you cared so much about a console that did so little. I've experienced these fizzled affairs twice, and both times they were named "Nintendo."

The Wii isn't a system that can be embraced and loved. It's a system for video game booty calls. Think about the biggest games on the Wii, then think about how often they come out. Mario, Zelda, Metroid. Sure, every time they come out it's a great experience, but it happens so rarely, and in between there's little more than shovelware to tide you over. It's like a significant other who only deigns to indulge in relations three times a year. Sure, the occasional third-party title shines through, but that's even more rare. It's great when it happens, but what are you going to do the rest of the time?

You don't have a love affair with the Wii, you have occasional booty calls. You see a new first-party game, you call up the Wii for a week or two of fun, and then you ignore it until the next big title comes out.

After being staunchly pro-Wii for quite some time (I had an NES and SNES upbringing), I realized the truth: I don't love the Wii. It's fun, it's enjoyable, but I don't use it nearly as much as the 360 or PS3. And, in retrospect, I find that it painfully reminds me of that other failed Nintendo romance, the Nintendo 64.

Oh, the N64 was awesome at first. Super Mario 64 and Ocarina of Time were groundbreaking. Mario Kart 64 and F-Zero 64 were awesome. Super Smash Brothers started on the system. Goldeneye defined console multiplayer for a whole generation. And yet... that was all the N64 had going for it. While the Playstation kept getting more and more new games, amassing a ridiculously large library of excellent titles (including a half-dozen excellent RPGs, a genre that the N64 effectively ignored), the N64 coasted by on its handful of great first-party games.

In a sense, the Wii has been even worse to gamers than the N64. Sure, the N64 had a disappointing library, but at least it didn't outright cheat on us. Instead of simply producing an anemic selection of games, Nintendo works feverishly to court its new loves: casual "gamers." The company is exerting so much effort on appealing to its new cash cow it's almost completely forgotten about the people who actually brought it to the dance. The Wii tosses us the occasional wink and smile, but then it goes home with grandparents and soccer moms.

Yeah, I'll call up my Wii for some fun at the end of May when Super Mario Galaxy 2 comes out. And I'll call it up again in August when Metroid: Other M comes out. But the romance is over, man.